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The stars were dim this am when I went walking. Lots of gusting winds, too. Now more clouds are moving in, which might bring more rain--we could use that. I actually brought an umbrella for the walk across campus to class, though, so knowing karma this will ensure it doesn't rain. But early in the morning like that, I can really tell we're getting the first hints of fall--the leaves are starting to sound a bit dry, crisp in the wind, rather than the hissing sussurous of spring and summer.
It occurred to me that the sound of the trees roaring and whooshing, their branches swaying--when everything else is so silent and dark--is a very lonely sound. I've always felt like fall is a very lonely time, which makes me wonder why I like it so much. (And I wonder how to say "Autumn is lonely" in Japanese. I know the basic words, but it'll be ages before we're taught the grammar. *sighs*) The cicaidas were silent today, too...I wonder if they're dying off/hibernating/whatever already--but the crickets were extra loud as if to fill in the gaps.
**
Stomach's been rebelling/complaining all day yesterday into today. Maybe it wasn't what I ate Monday.
**
Am unsettled at how down and moody I still feel. I don't understand why certain things are still hitting me so hard. I really do wish this week were over. Am feeling a good deal of guilt about family things, and about other issues. Am good at guilt. Am very good at promising of myself, and not delivering, and then feeling regret/guilt about it. Eh. I should call Mom, earlier than Thursday, but I just haven't been able to make myself. And I should call Dave, so I can coordinate a ride for him for Saturday, but haven't been able to get myself to do that either.
**
Guess Michael's better enough for full days of work now, so guess I've got to go talk to him tonight. Whee. *tired sarcasm*
**
Did a mess of Japanese homework/studying last night. I was a bit ahead already, but this gets me more so. So I won't have to worry about doing any this weekend--won't have the time or motivation anyway. Am through all the workbook/reading practice/language lab things for the first chapter. Which unnerves me to realize how close we are to our first test, then. We've had quizzes, but not an actual *test* yet...so it'll be the first thing I've had like that in years.
**
Gonna be one of those stewing/fretting/worrying days, I can tell. My work gives my mind too much freedom to wander on its own. Hmmf, and wish a good PoT fic would show up out there somewhere...I could use a good comforting InuKai one.
**
*ponders* Would it be something like 'aki wa samishii desu'? I have no idea. Am guessing totally. Go me.
**
(Edit) Have heard that the nation's blood supply is very low/short. Am thinking of donating--consider doing so as well. That's not something we should ever be low on. And it shouldn't be something we only think to give during desperate times--blood is always needed, and always simple to give, really.
**
(Editx2) Fsck the RIAA. Fsck them hard. Maybe they never watched Seseme Street and heard how we're supposed to share and give gifts, not just hoard every single thing. And you know what? If I buy some piece of music, it's *mine*. And something that's mine is mine to do with _as I please_--including in giving away, if I so choose. Goddamned greed in this country. And have heard this week's Onion is good. *checks* Ha. Yes. It is good. Especially this bit: http://www.theonion.com/3935/top_story.html
**
Right. Done now.
It occurred to me that the sound of the trees roaring and whooshing, their branches swaying--when everything else is so silent and dark--is a very lonely sound. I've always felt like fall is a very lonely time, which makes me wonder why I like it so much. (And I wonder how to say "Autumn is lonely" in Japanese. I know the basic words, but it'll be ages before we're taught the grammar. *sighs*) The cicaidas were silent today, too...I wonder if they're dying off/hibernating/whatever already--but the crickets were extra loud as if to fill in the gaps.
**
Stomach's been rebelling/complaining all day yesterday into today. Maybe it wasn't what I ate Monday.
**
Am unsettled at how down and moody I still feel. I don't understand why certain things are still hitting me so hard. I really do wish this week were over. Am feeling a good deal of guilt about family things, and about other issues. Am good at guilt. Am very good at promising of myself, and not delivering, and then feeling regret/guilt about it. Eh. I should call Mom, earlier than Thursday, but I just haven't been able to make myself. And I should call Dave, so I can coordinate a ride for him for Saturday, but haven't been able to get myself to do that either.
**
Guess Michael's better enough for full days of work now, so guess I've got to go talk to him tonight. Whee. *tired sarcasm*
**
Did a mess of Japanese homework/studying last night. I was a bit ahead already, but this gets me more so. So I won't have to worry about doing any this weekend--won't have the time or motivation anyway. Am through all the workbook/reading practice/language lab things for the first chapter. Which unnerves me to realize how close we are to our first test, then. We've had quizzes, but not an actual *test* yet...so it'll be the first thing I've had like that in years.
**
Gonna be one of those stewing/fretting/worrying days, I can tell. My work gives my mind too much freedom to wander on its own. Hmmf, and wish a good PoT fic would show up out there somewhere...I could use a good comforting InuKai one.
**
*ponders* Would it be something like 'aki wa samishii desu'? I have no idea. Am guessing totally. Go me.
**
(Edit) Have heard that the nation's blood supply is very low/short. Am thinking of donating--consider doing so as well. That's not something we should ever be low on. And it shouldn't be something we only think to give during desperate times--blood is always needed, and always simple to give, really.
**
(Editx2) Fsck the RIAA. Fsck them hard. Maybe they never watched Seseme Street and heard how we're supposed to share and give gifts, not just hoard every single thing. And you know what? If I buy some piece of music, it's *mine*. And something that's mine is mine to do with _as I please_--including in giving away, if I so choose. Goddamned greed in this country. And have heard this week's Onion is good. *checks* Ha. Yes. It is good. Especially this bit: http://www.theonion.com/3935/top_story.html
**
Right. Done now.
