4-5

[whitereflection]

cemetery, silent.

shovel thunks
dirt thuds
wood cracks like dry bone
wind shrieks
shotgun blasts
salt hisses like sandy rain
match snaps
flame whumps
fire pops like cheap fireworks
voices murmur
footsteps fade
night quiets like they were never there.

Comments

[keerawa.livejournal.com]

This one's gorgeous. I particularly like the way you've woven together analogies and onomatopoeia in a pattern to create a full soundscape.

[whitereflection.livejournal.com]

Thank you, I'd hoped that would work ♥

[theron09.livejournal.com]

I love this - the mood that it creates is amazing.

[whitereflection.livejournal.com]

Thanks! :)

[kilynn16.livejournal.com]

Love. This. Especially the last three lines. They create such a vivid image of the two of them walking off into the night together. *sighs*

[whitereflection.livejournal.com]

♥ Thanks so much--I was hoping that'd come across right. :)

[paxlux.livejournal.com]

all in a day's work
they fight and bleed; but it
takes a single match

[whitereflection.livejournal.com]

♥♥♥ you♥

[paxlux.livejournal.com]

♥ ♥ ♥ OH, YOU. STOP. ♥