not to pull your halo down
Feb. 11th, 2008 08:20 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
whitereflectionBitter cold outside (around 3 above, feels like 12 below), cold in my office, I'm fucking tired even with coffee (usual post-Don's thing of only getting a couple hours sleep), and I'm fucking disgusted at the usual him.
A rough weekend for one where I did very little. Had that vac day Friday--hit the store to get what Mom would need, then made a soup from scratch to crockpot. Cut my thumb really good while slicing, only to discover the bandaids I had on hand were utter crap and wouldn't stick (not even with packing tape assisting). Drove across town holding a napkin to my thumb, finally was able to buy a few real bandaids when I got Mom at the airport.
First thing, of course, after she was picked up, Mom wanted to go see her sister at the hospital. I hadn't expected to go along with. Saw my cousin there that I hadn't seen since my late teens. And my aunt...I guess I'll just say that I've never been up to ICU before, never seen anyone that close to death before, ever. I have felt unsettled and off since. Spent the rest of the weekend very solitary and avoidant. Drove Mom back to the hospital as necessary, only got together with Anj/Gina Saturday and Don Sunday because plans had already been made.
As far as my aunt goes, she did pass away Sunday evening. Along with everything else, she'd contracted another infection at the hospital, then pneumonia Saturday, and the decision was finally made then. Of course her immediate family was there, as well as many of the siblings like my mother (total of 9 sisters and 3 brothers in the family, a good portion local), and my grandmother. They'll be starting to plan memorial service things today.
At least Mom can rest today. Thurs. night she'd only gotten 2 hrs sleep, Friday was not the most or the most restful, Saturday she never slept (she was at the hospital with some of the other family all night), then she finally got some sleep last night. But us getting up and ready this morning woke her up. Hoping she'll nap today. Also get some cat therapy (the four adore her, and beg for brushing and pettings and play constantly--she's a doting cat-grandma).
Never did get my bills done this weekend, just laundry and some dishes. Need to stop at the store again, but I doubt I'll do the bills again. Just don't feel like it--only want to do what I've been doing the last couple days, which is dink around in-game and hope that people leave me alone.
I really, really, really, really just want to go home. I didn't even want to come in in the first place. If I didn't have a book shipment that came in Thursday, I might have called in. Still mulling over taking part of the day. Not like I'm truly grieving, not hit as hard as say Mom, but I'm just so tired and down.
A rough weekend for one where I did very little. Had that vac day Friday--hit the store to get what Mom would need, then made a soup from scratch to crockpot. Cut my thumb really good while slicing, only to discover the bandaids I had on hand were utter crap and wouldn't stick (not even with packing tape assisting). Drove across town holding a napkin to my thumb, finally was able to buy a few real bandaids when I got Mom at the airport.
First thing, of course, after she was picked up, Mom wanted to go see her sister at the hospital. I hadn't expected to go along with. Saw my cousin there that I hadn't seen since my late teens. And my aunt...I guess I'll just say that I've never been up to ICU before, never seen anyone that close to death before, ever. I have felt unsettled and off since. Spent the rest of the weekend very solitary and avoidant. Drove Mom back to the hospital as necessary, only got together with Anj/Gina Saturday and Don Sunday because plans had already been made.
As far as my aunt goes, she did pass away Sunday evening. Along with everything else, she'd contracted another infection at the hospital, then pneumonia Saturday, and the decision was finally made then. Of course her immediate family was there, as well as many of the siblings like my mother (total of 9 sisters and 3 brothers in the family, a good portion local), and my grandmother. They'll be starting to plan memorial service things today.
At least Mom can rest today. Thurs. night she'd only gotten 2 hrs sleep, Friday was not the most or the most restful, Saturday she never slept (she was at the hospital with some of the other family all night), then she finally got some sleep last night. But us getting up and ready this morning woke her up. Hoping she'll nap today. Also get some cat therapy (the four adore her, and beg for brushing and pettings and play constantly--she's a doting cat-grandma).
Never did get my bills done this weekend, just laundry and some dishes. Need to stop at the store again, but I doubt I'll do the bills again. Just don't feel like it--only want to do what I've been doing the last couple days, which is dink around in-game and hope that people leave me alone.
I really, really, really, really just want to go home. I didn't even want to come in in the first place. If I didn't have a book shipment that came in Thursday, I might have called in. Still mulling over taking part of the day. Not like I'm truly grieving, not hit as hard as say Mom, but I'm just so tired and down.
