nothing new (still not a grown-up)

For the everything is about spn tag:
http://sadnesses.tumblr.com/post/1000560582
http://www.iwrotethisforyou.me/2010/06/taking-of-turns.html

Mood swing lingering, mixed with high anxiety. Bit of insomnia, a lot of procrastinating about everything except a few absolute must-do things (about one must-do a day seems what I'm capable of). Or procrastinating until the deadline passes and it just becomes skipped. Though it says a lot that what's highest on the anxiety/panic list is that I'm still failing at writing the summer_sam_love fic I said I'd do, rather than say, the fact that I'm still jobless and in lieu of employment still haven't committed to going back to school. Way to be an adult, self. (Also, it's a bit extra stupid that a couple of weeks ago, I got an email from the community mods checking in if I'd still be doing my claim fic, and I could have asked to have the episode given to someone else. But no, I said I'd be ready. I promised. It's stupid to be failing even in hobbies. And I know I still have several weeks, but I have come up with *nothing* so far. And yet I told them I was going to be ready. How can I go back to the mods and say no, I really can't do it after all? Stupid. I wish I hadn't been "up" then, and able to be more realistic.)

I really need to take a lesson from those who are going through similar real life type issues (or worse), and who are actually *doing* things about it and not just hiding and fearing and being useless.

Noted I've been procrastinating about getting my hair cut since May. It was too long/a mess even then. Yeah.