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Dec. 19th, 2006 06:10 pmGod, a day. Been fried in general from holiday stress, work stress, being at the end of my rope with James behaviors. But turns out hormones/pm-fucking-s this time is the sort where I'm near psychotic, whether it be anger or depression. Gotta love that. Was overly emo and weepy the last couple days, but today it's been constant, broke down badly at one point at work. Ended up freaking out for a good half hour, good thing Anj is a patient person and willing to listen. Felt wrong and off all day after--ill, weak and shaky, almost cold at times, tired.
Lotta little things building up I guess. Least I got the delivery to the Salvation Army Adopt-a-Family thing I'd pledged for done on the way home. Nice people. Had more trouble than I expected making the phone call and meeting them in person for the drop-off. My old get-so-shy-I-lock-up thing kicked in, couldn't even call them for a week, was a nervous wreck when I called them and met them.
Kinda shaky on the whole holiday spirit thing. Really started out this season well, but things have kind of worn it down, and it's like it's all drained away a lot. Don't think I'm getting that mini-tree up, guess I'll put it in the storage room. Did get decorations up at my desk at work a couple weeks ago, so maybe it's not a big deal I didn't get home ones up again. Just, kind of wish I could get through a whole Christmas/New Year's still feeling up and good like I used to--back before 2000ish where crap stuff started happening this time of year. Least I put in a decent effort this time 'round.
Lotta little things building up I guess. Least I got the delivery to the Salvation Army Adopt-a-Family thing I'd pledged for done on the way home. Nice people. Had more trouble than I expected making the phone call and meeting them in person for the drop-off. My old get-so-shy-I-lock-up thing kicked in, couldn't even call them for a week, was a nervous wreck when I called them and met them.
Kinda shaky on the whole holiday spirit thing. Really started out this season well, but things have kind of worn it down, and it's like it's all drained away a lot. Don't think I'm getting that mini-tree up, guess I'll put it in the storage room. Did get decorations up at my desk at work a couple weeks ago, so maybe it's not a big deal I didn't get home ones up again. Just, kind of wish I could get through a whole Christmas/New Year's still feeling up and good like I used to--back before 2000ish where crap stuff started happening this time of year. Least I put in a decent effort this time 'round.
