(no subject)
Nov. 15th, 2004 06:13 pmLost:
seek and--
(Yearning, pt.3)
I lost you
Perhaps when I set you down
like a set of keys
tossed to the side, discarded
in a moment of rush
and distraction
--but are suddenly disappeared when I remembered
to come looking for you
(though I'm -sure- this was the place
I left you).
Or perhaps it was when
you slipped away from me
like water-flowing, fancy silk
pouring through my blunt, rough fingers;
like spun-sugar-delicate glass
crushed into splinters by my bullish hands
--for I am as clumsy with my
emotions
as I am with my body,
and I think it was inevitable that eventually
I'd drop or break you.
Or perhaps you were
stolen
by some crafty thief
who spoke the right words in the right combination,
stealthily wrapped neglected-you in dark cloth
of attention and affection,
--and left me with an empty safe
aching hollowly where my heart should be,
because I'd know
I could never replace you.
But I suppose it's not important
how it happened,
or when or why or where;
or even how the need to find you
and bring you back again
burns like ice when I breathe.
The only thing that really matters now,
I think,
is that
hiding for so long
from noticing you weren't there;
pretending all this time
to not realize you were gone;
believing with stubborn faith
that your presence still existed behind the silence;
in the end,
didn't change,
even a little bit,
that fact that
I lost you.
seek and--
(Yearning, pt.3)
I lost you
Perhaps when I set you down
like a set of keys
tossed to the side, discarded
in a moment of rush
and distraction
--but are suddenly disappeared when I remembered
to come looking for you
(though I'm -sure- this was the place
I left you).
Or perhaps it was when
you slipped away from me
like water-flowing, fancy silk
pouring through my blunt, rough fingers;
like spun-sugar-delicate glass
crushed into splinters by my bullish hands
--for I am as clumsy with my
emotions
as I am with my body,
and I think it was inevitable that eventually
I'd drop or break you.
Or perhaps you were
stolen
by some crafty thief
who spoke the right words in the right combination,
stealthily wrapped neglected-you in dark cloth
of attention and affection,
--and left me with an empty safe
aching hollowly where my heart should be,
because I'd know
I could never replace you.
But I suppose it's not important
how it happened,
or when or why or where;
or even how the need to find you
and bring you back again
burns like ice when I breathe.
The only thing that really matters now,
I think,
is that
hiding for so long
from noticing you weren't there;
pretending all this time
to not realize you were gone;
believing with stubborn faith
that your presence still existed behind the silence;
in the end,
didn't change,
even a little bit,
that fact that
I lost you.