whitereflection (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
whitereflection) wrote2010-07-22 10:27 am
whitereflection) wrote2010-07-22 10:27 am
Entry tags:
a touch displeased
So I get up this morning to hear from my mother that my last grandparent, her father, died last night. Let me say first off that this is in no way needing of any condolences. I have no love for this man, and as I expected am relieved he's finally gone. And as I have been for years, a touch bitter that of all my grandparents that he was the longest lived and the last to go.
What is irking me though... He was a horrible person, and did horrible things to certain members of that side of my family, and he never felt any remorse and never even felt he'd done anything wrong. There's a large number of that side of the family that cut off ties with him; but there were also a few that did keep in contact with him and cared for him toward the end.
The problem is, these few were the less than responsible and mature members of the family. They couldn't seem to figure out how to make funeral arrangements somewhere along the way (even though he was over 90 and so it was just a matter of time), and don't appear to even have access to whatever bank accounts my grandfather had. So now they're in a tizzy and have pulled my mother into the situation to start going through papers and trying to figure out if there's any funds in his accounts for funeral/burial stuff.
My mother is one of the last people who should have to deal with anything to do with my grandfather's life. It should be those few that maintained contact despite what my grandfather was guilty of. Yet because she's too goddamned nice and overresponsible, and always helps if asked, she's over there going through paperwork despite the place is probably scuzzy and going to kill her asthma and allergies and set off who knows what old mental triggers.
And lord knows, if they truly don't have access to his funds, it'll end up in court or something to get access to what little's there, to deal with it and the final arrangements, and I'm sure they'll drag her along on that too, because they're too helpless and idiotic to be able to manage anything like the adults they are. What a stupid mess.
I dunno. There's something to be said for just kindling and lighter fluid and a match (fuck, might as well get some salt), and leave it at that.
What is irking me though... He was a horrible person, and did horrible things to certain members of that side of my family, and he never felt any remorse and never even felt he'd done anything wrong. There's a large number of that side of the family that cut off ties with him; but there were also a few that did keep in contact with him and cared for him toward the end.
The problem is, these few were the less than responsible and mature members of the family. They couldn't seem to figure out how to make funeral arrangements somewhere along the way (even though he was over 90 and so it was just a matter of time), and don't appear to even have access to whatever bank accounts my grandfather had. So now they're in a tizzy and have pulled my mother into the situation to start going through papers and trying to figure out if there's any funds in his accounts for funeral/burial stuff.
My mother is one of the last people who should have to deal with anything to do with my grandfather's life. It should be those few that maintained contact despite what my grandfather was guilty of. Yet because she's too goddamned nice and overresponsible, and always helps if asked, she's over there going through paperwork despite the place is probably scuzzy and going to kill her asthma and allergies and set off who knows what old mental triggers.
And lord knows, if they truly don't have access to his funds, it'll end up in court or something to get access to what little's there, to deal with it and the final arrangements, and I'm sure they'll drag her along on that too, because they're too helpless and idiotic to be able to manage anything like the adults they are. What a stupid mess.
I dunno. There's something to be said for just kindling and lighter fluid and a match (fuck, might as well get some salt), and leave it at that.